Unbelievable but true. Over the past few weeks 4 of my female friends asked me to help them to set up profiles on a dating website here in Thailand. They mainly asked me to check their spelling but also ‘what Farang wants to read’. I’m not a big fan of pretending to be something that you’re not, but I think it won’t hurt to mention a few things that I now saw quite often that are a ‘no go’ for (normal, not those creepy kinda guys) foreigners. While having helped them I also asked back what freaks them out on a typical profile of a foreign guy. I’ll share those insights as well. Here we go:
5 things girls shouldn’t say.
1.) I’m not special but I’m limited edition
That’s one of those T-Shirt slogans that have been big over the past 2 years here in Thailand. Almost every ‘hip and cool’ girl has a short saying that. Well girls, it’s stupid. It doesn’t really make sense and since everybody wears it, it doesn’t even make you special. Everybody wants to read something unique on a dating website. Don’t just copy a slogan that every other, sorry, bargirl, has on her shirt or on her profile. Think about something own ’cause with a slogan like that you are not limited edition, you’re just limited.
2.) WRITING IN CAPITAL LETTERS AND SAYING THAT YOU’RE A GOOD GIRL
Yeah, of course. You’re awesome. And not a slut or a bargirl or anything like that. And you want the world to know it! The bad thing however is that if people scream (capital letters are screaming when writing) they usually try to hide something. This means if you write into your profile: “NO SEX NO CAM PERV GO AWAY” people will think you had lots of experience with those things plus you seem to be super unfriendly. In order to appear smart or ‘good’ you should simply write an honest profile with some insights. That’s all people ask for.
3.) –__–…^^//—- – weird punctuation / emoticons
Well firstly emoticons via punctuation are so 2000 and totally not cute. But that’s not the point here. What’s super annoying, from my point of view, are messages or profiles with weird punctuation. “Hello,,,,,..,,, my name is,,,,,,Mai,,,,and I,,,,…–,,,” – WHAT THE HECK? Is what the person thinks who reads that profile. So use punctuation the way it’s supposed to be. You won’t look boring, you’ll look smart.
4.) If you nice me, I nice you
Grammar is sexy! I know, nobody’s perfect and my Thai is far away from being good so I really appreciate everybody who tries to speak a little bit of English. However when you present yourself online you want to make sure that it’s in a good way, right? So spend some time on grammar and spell checks. Especially some basic grammatical issues (do, does, etc.) should be right in order to attract guys with brains.
5.) Looking for teach me English
It’s really nice that you want to improve your English skills – but honestly: You are on a dating website to find an English teacher? That’s either a) stupid or b) not true. So don’t lie to yourself or anyone else. Furthermore most people (guys) are not on a dating website to find students – they want a date! This means even if they agree on ‘teaching’ you, they will always think about dating, not teaching. So be honest in your profile, say what you really want and don’t try to be a ‘good girl’ by pretending to look for a ‘teacher’.
I didn’t mean to be mean here but those are some things I saw a lot over the past few weeks when consulting those dating profiles.
5 things guys shouldn’t say.
1.) Don’t mention sex, never.
Not even when trying to make fun or being sarcastic or whatever…’good’ girls (the kind of girl that you are looking for, right? Other girls can be found easily in Khaosan Rd. or around Sanam Luang…) really don’t like talking about that immediately. Even if it’s a joke of some kind. Don’t do it. They’ll label you as ‘another foreign perv’ and your chance is gone.
2.) I’ll be there for a few weeks
That’s basically asking for a fuck buddy. Or a guide. Or a fucking guide. Congratulations. Fail. Please go back to Khaosan Rd.
3.) Let me teach you
Yeah! Same same as for the girls. Smart girls won’t be looking for a teacher on a online dating website. So if you offer your services like that – you’re appearing creepy – and your probably are. Go away!
Alright that’s something I do quite often. Being sarcastic. And it almost never works in Thailand. With a few cool people it does – but finding such cool people online who understand your sarcasm at first sight – not likely. So don’t try to be to funny or sarcastic. Especially when it comes to Thailand as country – many people don’t like hear foreigners making fun of their home!
5.) Showing off
Girls here are quite ‘afraid’ of ‘bad’ guys who only are here for sex. If you show off to much they suppose you’re one of those guys – so be honest, write a bit about yourself without trying to show off to much and you’re all good.
I know those are not incredibly secret revelations – but I saw lots of profiles ‘violating’ those 5 rules/tricks/tips. If I’m wrong or forgot something though let me know. I’m happy to update the list.
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